


High Hopes for the Living

by CryInTheNight



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Anxiety, Hurt/Comfort, Jeon Jungkook-centric, M/M, Multi, Not horribly gory, OT7, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Unreliable Narrator, but they are vampires so there will be blood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-03
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 21:34:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26275708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CryInTheNight/pseuds/CryInTheNight
Summary: Jungkook was fine.He was always hungry, he hadn’t had fresh blood in ages, and he was going to have a breakdown if he had to drink another blood bag.But it was okay, because he was fine.(He’s not fine)
Relationships: Everyone/Everyone, Jeon Jungkook/Everyone, OT7 - Relationship
Comments: 91
Kudos: 552





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> What did I just write?? I’ve only very recently gotten into BTS, and I’m not usually a fan of vampires??? But this story has been rolling around in my head, probably because I’ve read so many awesome vampire BTS fics recently.
> 
> I’m a big reader but not a big writer, so please let me know if you see any problems! I am 100% open to criticisms. 
> 
> WARNINGS:  
> I’m not personally a fan of violence/gore, but this is a vampire fic, so there will be blood and maybe some fighting. I don’t plan on it being very graphic, but I know comfort levels vary so be warned.
> 
> Also! This fic will feature descriptions of self-harm, self-esteem issues, and anxiety. Possibly some disordered eating, if you squint. If any of these things are triggering for you please don’t read! Protecting yourself is important.
> 
> With that out of the way, I hope you enjoy.

  
Jungkook sat perfectly still on the kitchen chair, his shoes on and his bag clenched tightly in his fists. Soon, soon, soon, he chanted in his head. Just a little longer and he’d get to feed. 

It was almost 7pm and Yoongi was due home at 8, having spent the day at his studio so he could take Jungkook out tonight. 

He’d finally get fresh blood, after a week working through blood bags.

Although incredibly convenient, no vampire preferred to drink from blood bags. The blood turned thick and stale over time, absorbing the flavor of the plastic, and although there were countless recipes and additives designed to heat and preserve it, it was far from a perfect process.

Despite their shortcomings though, most vampires could live off of them with no problem. Fresh blood was a treat, not a necessity. 

Jungkook wasn’t most vampires. Since he’d first been turned, he’d struggled to control his bloodlust, wholly unsatisfied with the stale blood bags. The first few months he’d refused them entirely, something that had driven his hyungs crazy as they’d tried to find a solution. 

Fresh blood was hard to come across, at least legally. With enough money it was accessible, and his coven had plenty of that, but that didn’t mean it was always safe. There were risks associated with the clubs and bars that catered to vampires, and it wasn’t uncommon for the humans and the vampires involved to be injured, and for the police to end up being called.

Blood bags were safer. Jungkook understood that, mentally. It was his body that didn’t. 

It had gotten easier over time, and he’d adjusted to the taste as best as he could, but they’d never satisfied him the way that fresh blood did. Never calmed the hunger and rage that simmered just below the surface. 

He’d been a vampire for almost two years, and sometimes he felt as desperate and out of control as a freshly turned fledgling.

He wasn’t exactly sure how long he’d been there, but he stayed frozen in his seat, muscles tense as he waited. Yoongi was late, but Yoongi was almost always late coming home. That was OK. He’d waited a week; he could wait another few hours. 

But as the night stretched on, he felt his patience wearing thin. He sat motionless in his chair, waiting, the only movement in the dimly lit room the clock slowly counting down the time. 

Finally, just after the clock hit 5am, Jungkook heard the front door creak, shuffling steps coming down the hall. He startled, a smile coming automatically to his face, and he felt excitement jolt through him. 

He jumped out of his seat just in time for Yoongi to round the corner, bouncing up on the balls of his heels to greet his Hyung. 

Whatever hopes he had for feeding were dashed almost immediately when he saw the state Yoongi was in. 

Yoongi looked exhausted, eyes heavy and hair a mess, and he swore as he took in Jungkook waiting for him. “Fuck, Kookie, I’m so sorry. I forgot it was feeding night. Today was insane, I got tied up, and…”

He trailed off, wincing as he looked Jungkook over. He hated disappointing any of his nestmates, but it was hardest with the maknaes. He was weak to their soft smiles and puppy eyes.

“It’s nearly daybreak, but if we leave now maybe we could catch the last shift at Moonlight?” Yoongi offered reluctantly. Moonlight wasn’t their first pick of feeding clubs, but they were one of the few that offered an early morning shift. Most clubs didn’t bother with staying open so close to daybreak. 

Jungkook swallowed down the disappointment, and brutally forced back his hunger. It was ok, he’d be ok. Better to be safe, it wasn’t worth risking getting caught out in the sun, and Yoongi clearly wasn’t in the right state to keep them both safe if they left now. 

Jungkook gave Yoongi his best smile, feeling it strain the corners of his mouth, and waved Yoongi away, pushing him toward the hall toward his room. 

“I’m OK Hyung, I can wait. Go get some rest.”

Yoongi’s shoulders slumped down in relief, his face creased with exhaustion. “I promise I’ll make it up to you next week,” he said with a sigh, patting Jungkook gently on the head. “You can grab two or three blood bags tonight, if you need them.” 

He gave Jungkook another grateful smile, and slipped out of the room to finally get to bed.

As soon as Yoongi left the smile slipped from Jungkook’s face, his arms curling around his waist and tears filling his eyes. He moved on autopilot to the fridge, grabbing three blood bags and taking them directly to his room. 

Three was better than the usual one, but he could already feel his fangs itching against his gums, his stomach rolling at the idea of choking down the old, stale blood for another night. 

Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem. They usually avoided the clubs on the weekend, too much of a crowd, but if they went as a group it was safe enough. He could have just asked Jin and Namjoon to take him, maybe dragged Yoongi out with them and made it a night. 

But Jin and Namjoon were out of town, along with Hoseok, and Yoongi was desperately trying to balance providing for their coven with his own work, and it was clearly beginning to wear him down.

Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook had been doing the best they could to take some of the responsibilities off his shoulders, but there wasn’t much the youngest three could do. None of them had the strength and control to step up and lead. 

Not without three of their eldest to guide them.

Jin, Hoseok, and Namjoon had been gone two weeks at this point, and weren’t due back for six more. It was the longest they’d ever stayed away from the coven, and it had been stressful for all of them. 

They were meeting with covens from across the world, advocating for protection and integration of vampires within human society, and although they all understood what an important opportunity this was, saying they hated being apart was an understatement. Knowing that their two oldest, the leaders of their nest weren’t even on the same continent as the rest of them? It made Jungkook feel sick. 

Almost as sick as blood bags. Like the blood bags he still had fisted in his hands, not any more appetizing than they had been when he’d first pulled them from the fridge. 

At this point it was just a war of his hunger against his disgust. His hunger won. His hunger always won. 

He bit into the bags as cleanly as he could, choking down the blood. It burned as it went down, but he felt his hunger wash through his mind, staining his vision red.

Without any more hesitation, he emptied the bags, drinking until he was left gagging and gasping as he looked down at the empty bags. His stomach was cramping, but the hunger was drowned out to an uncomfortable buzz instead of a raging fire. This was fine. 

He was fine. 

Jungkook slowly slipped under the covers, curling up in the center of his bed and shoving the empty bags onto the floor. His stomach burned with old blood, and his eyes burned with tears, but he was fine. 

Maybe he wasn’t fine. 


	2. Chapter 2

Taehyung slipped up behind Jungkook, draping across his back in a hug. “Kooookie! Happy Friday,” He sang, directly into Jungkook’s ear.

“Hi hyung!” Jungkook said with a laugh. “How was class?”

Taehyung had been taking early evening classes in fashion design at the local university for the last few months, and it still made him as excited as a puppy whenever he talked about them. After nearly 50 years as a vampire he’d finally built up enough sun resistance to handle a commute in the early evening and he’d been positively thrilled with the new options available to him because of it.

Because sure, there were plenty of universities, shops, and restaurants that were open at night to accommodate vampire clientele, but the selection was limited. Demand was lower so the options were fewer. While Taehyung could (and did) take night slots for most of his courses, there were some classes they just didn’t offer.

For most of their coven this wasn’t a big deal. Seokjin was old enough to be entirely unphased by daylight, Yoongi, Namjoon, and Hoseok were only rarely bothered, and Jimin, and now Taehyung, were fine for short stretches as long as they took precautions. 

Jungkook was the only one young enough to be in real danger from the sun. It would be another half century or so before he could start venturing out in the early evening. He still could barely believe he’d be alive to see it. 

“It was good! We’re working on a group show right now, so I might be staying over at one of their places this weekend so I can get some work done. There’s only one other vamp in my group, so it’s easier to power through during the day.” 

Taehyung was pouting at this. It wasn’t the first time he’d stayed out for a few days at a time to work on projects (it was a lot easier than trying to work out a daytime commute while half-asleep), but it was a bit of a pain to have to change their sleeping schedules entirely to work around humans. 

Unfortunately the usual rule of the thumb was majority wins; more vampires than humans meant you worked at night, more humans than vampires you meant you worked in the day. Vampires, being a solid minority, usually got the short end of the stick. 

Jungkook frowned, twisting around without breaking out of Taehyung hold. “Shouldn’t you be sleeping, then? If you’ll be leaving in the morning?” He asked. 

If Jungkook thought Taehyung had been pouting before that was nothing compared to his face now. “I’m not leaving until 6, I can stay up a few more hours! I haven’t seen everyone in ages, and Jimin and Yoongi aren’t even awake yet.” 

Jungkook couldn’t help but smile at this, as Taehyung buried his pouting face into the crook of his neck. Looks like he’d be keeping his hyung company for the next few hours or at least until the others were up, not that he was complaining.

He pulled them both through the hall into the living room, dragging Taehyung down onto the couch so they could curl up together. It was easy in moments like this, Taehyung draped across his chest and pressing him into the couch cushions, to shove the hunger into the back of his mind. The warmth and companionship did a lot to keep it at bay, and sometimes he wondered if he could forgo blood bags altogether and live directly off of hugs and cuddles. 

Maybe not, but he could dream. 

Jungkook drew his fingers through Taehyung’s soft brown hair, petting him absently as he listened to him chatter about his day. It was hard sometimes, balancing everyone’s schedule so they slept and woke at similar times and got to see each other. Half the time it seemed like they were all in and out at all different hours every day, and it was only after two or three days that they’d realize someone had been missing entirely. 

Normally Seokjin was the one to corral them all, sending the maknaes to sleep at a reasonable hour in the morning and dragging the hyungs (mostly Yoongi), out of bed in the evening to socialize with the rest of them. 

With Seokjin gone, it fell to Yoongi to organize them the best he could. Considering Yoongi’s own less-than-stellar abilities at regulating his sleep… well, let’s just say they were all working on it together right now. 

Jungkook, as the only one home full-time, had taken it upon himself to try and spend at least a few hours every night with the rest of them. Sometimes this just meant curling up in Yoongi’s bed as he slept during the morning, and sometimes it was all-night marathons with Taehyung and Jimin in the evenings, but it was always time well spent. 

Jimin and Taehyung were both young enough that they’d only in the last few years been venturing out in public unsupervised, so they spent most nights (and early evenings) at university or just out enjoying their newfound freedom. 

Yoongi, as the second eldest, worked most days. It was out of passion rather than necessity, producing songs and making his own music, but he had a tendency to overdo it with long and irregular hours out of the nest and in his studio.

All of them did their best to ensure there was someone present in the house with Jungkook at all times, for safety and for comfort, but with half their coven out of the country right now sometimes that just meant one of his hyungs sleeping in the other room while he entertained himself.

Which was fine. Jungkook couldn’t complain, he knew none of them had planned to have another fledgling in the nest so soon after the last two had been added. But there were moments when he was sitting alone, curled up in the corner of this couch and choking down his hunger, that he really wished they had a little more time to spend together. 

Jungkook realized then that at some point while he had been thinking Taehyung had trailed off, tucking his face deeper into Jungkook’s neck and drifting off to sleep. Little puffs of air tickled his neck and he smiled, shifting himself further back onto the cushions. 

He was going to be here for a while. He wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Jungkook was still zoned out on the couch when Jimin gets up, Taehyung draped across him like a blanket and snoring. 

Jimin approached them quietly, slipping around to wedge himself against Jungkook’s side, perching on the edge of the cushion. “How long has he been asleep?” Jimin asked fondly. Seeing the two youngest curled up around each other wasn’t unusual, they both loved skinship, but it never stopped being cute enough to make Jimin’s heart melt. 

“Only an hour or two, he wanted to stay up and see you and Yoongi before he went to sleep, since he’ll be out the rest of the weekend,” Jungkook replied fondly. 

“Aiiish, that kid” Jimin complained, but he was smiling even as he said it. He couldn’t even pretend to be annoyed. Taehyung and Jimin were almost the exact same age, but Jimin had matured faster. He needed much less sleep to get by, only 8 or 9 hours a day, while Taehyung and Jungkook were both still sleeping for stretches of 12 hours or more. 

In theory they’d sleep less and less in one go over time, unless they followed Yoongi’s example and stayed up for days on end. It was amazing to see him crash, sometimes sleeping for a full day before reluctantly dragging himself back out of his room. Eventually, if they lived long enough, they’d be like Seokjin who needed maybe an hour or two a week. 

“How about I take him back to our room, and you can go wake up Yoongi? He probably needs to feed soon,” Jimin suggested, already reaching over to gently shake Taehyung awake. 

Jungkook nodded, carefully shifting the half asleep Taehyung off of his lap. He passed him over to Jimin, who helped the dazed Taehyung to his feet, letting Jimin support his weight as he pulled him off the couch. 

“I’ll be heading out with Taehyung for the weekend to keep an eye on him. If I don’t see you before we head out, I love you and I’ll miss you. We’ll be back Monday, but call me if you need me,” Jimin said softly, leaning down to press a kiss to Jungkook’s forehead, pink hair falling into his eyes. 

With that said, he pulled Taehyung away, waving one last time as they headed down the hall. 

Damn. He’d been hoping that Jimin would be staying behind for the weekend, he hadn’t gotten to see much of the pink haired vampire this week. He understood why he’d be going, they were young enough that it was smart to stick to the buddy system, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t miss them. Since he was the only one stuck at home, it was hard being separated from his nestmates so often. 

With a sigh, he got himself up and headed down the hall toward Yoongi’s room. Well, at least if it was time for Yoongi to feed he could get himself dinner at the same time. 

He was hungry. 

———  


Yoongi’s room was upstairs, all the way at the end of the hall. They all had their own bedrooms in the massive house, despite the fact that they almost never used them all. Most nights when the coven was together they nested in Seokjin’s room, which had a bed comfortable to fit all of them. But it was still nice for them all to have their own space, and it wasn’t unusual for them to split off alone or in pairs to get some undisturbed rest. Yoongi in particular liked to take advantage of having his own space, using it to crash in peace when he pushed himself too far. 

He didn’t bother knocking on Yoongi’s door, just slipped inside and made his way to the bed. As predicted Yoongi was still out cold, buried under a pile of pillows and blankets, with his face pressed down into the sheets. He carefully climbed over the mattress until he was stretched across Yoongi’s back, and nudged his head into his shoulder. 

“Yoongi, wake up, it’s time to eat,” he said, while carefully shaking him awake. 

Yoongi groaned as he cracked his eyes open, turning his head toward Jungkook. “Already? I swear I just fell asleep.”

Jungkook laughed, shaking his head. “You slept all day hyung. Now get up, I’m hungry.”

“You’re always hungry,” Yoongi said, already moving to stand up, rolling Jungkook off of his back. Yoongi sounded grumpy, but Jungkook knew he was kidding. He winced regardless, because he couldn’t argue. It was fine, Yoongi wasn’t wrong. 

They headed down to the kitchen together, and Jungkook sat himself down at the table while Yoongi heated up the stove. There were a few different ways to make blood bags more palatable, and heating them was one of the best. Jimin would even say that the bags tasted just as good as fresh blood when they were heated on the stove.

Jungkook strongly disagreed. 

But he appreciated the effort, since he knew Yoongi usually drank his blood cold and straight out of the bag. All of his hyungs did what they could to make it easier for Jungkook, and he really didn’t have the heart to tell them that it didn’t make a difference. 

Hesitantly, as Yoongi pulled two packets of blood out of the fridge for them, he asked “could I have two today?” 

Yoongi turned toward him with a frown. “You know that Seokjin really wants you to try and stick to one bag a day,” Yoongi reminded gently. “We need to get your hunger under control. I know it sucks, but it’s mental. One blood bag is enough.” 

“I know, hyung. And I’m trying, I promise. I’m just so hungry, and I didn’t get to feed last night…” it was a low blow, and they both knew it, but it worked. Yoongi didn’t reply, just went to the fridge and pulled out a second bag for Jungkook. 

“Fine. But tonight is the last night. I know it’s hard without Seokjin here, but it’s not good for you. You need to work on your control,” Yoongi felt defeated as he prepped the second bag. It was hard saying no when he could see Jungkook struggling so bad, but it hurt feeling like he was enabling him. 

Jungkook felt terrible, guilt settling into his stomach, but he couldn’t regret pushing. He could smell the blood as it heated and it made his body feel like it was burning. He needed it, and he needed it badly. He understood why his hyungs were concerned, he did, but that didn’t change how hard it was to hold himself back. He could probably go to the fridge and drain their whole supply dry right now and still be craving more. 

His hyungs had explained when he’d turned that most fledglings felt the hunger sharply for the first 4-6 months, before it started to settle. It wasn’t abnormal for fledglings to drink themselves sick, pushing themselves far past what their bodies could handle in an attempt to feel full. After that, it would only be so pressing if he didn’t feed when he was supposed to, and over time he’d need less and less blood to keep the hunger away. 

Turns out that wasn’t true at all, at least where Jungkook was concerned. It had been two years and he still felt the hunger burning just as badly as when he’d first been turned. He’d gotten better at ignoring it, at controlling the way he reacted to it, but it still  _ hurt.  _ And it hurt worse when he tried to cut down. 

Yoongi poured their servings into two large cups, carrying them over to the table. They sat in silence for the first few minutes, slowly drinking the warmed blood. 

Jungkook made sure to move slowly, controlling his instincts with an iron fist. He wanted to gulp it down desperately, struggled hard not to choke or make faces as he sipped it. The last thing he wanted to do was make his hyung feel bad about the stale blood, not after he’d used their missed feeding to guilt Yoongi into giving him a second bag against Seokjin’s instructions. 

“I really am sorry I forgot last night” Yoongi said quietly, after their cups were nearly empty. 

“It’s fine,” Jungkook replied, equally subdued. Yoongi worked tirelessly to make the rest of them happy, and he was hard on himself when he felt like he’d let them down. Jungkook hated being the one to make him feel like this.

“It’s not, but thank you. I’ll take you out Monday night instead. I’d take you this weekend, but without the others here…” he trailed off, but Jungkook understood. Safety in numbers, especially around a crowd. 

“Yeah, sounds good,” Jungkook mumbled, before letting them drift back into silence. They finished their dinner and cleaned up, the atmosphere still heavy with tension, before Jungkook excused himself back to his room. His stomach hurt worse than before he’d fed. 

———

Several hours later, Jungkook sat on his bed, legs curled under him as he took deep breaths. It’s fine, he was fine, he wasn’t actually hungry. He’d just eaten. It was in his head. 

He’d been trying to meditate for the last hour, something Hoseok had taught him to try and help him control the hunger pangs when they started spiking. It hadn’t helped yet, but Jungkook would try anything at this point. It  _ burned.  _

He lasted about ten more minutes before he gave up. 

This wasn’t working, his body was burning, his skin was crawling, he needed to feed. He knew Yoongi would be disappointed, but it was hard to care when he felt like he was going to shake out of his own skin. 

He stood on shaking legs, opening his door and heading down the hall to Yoongi’s room. A quick peek inside showed him he wasn’t there, so he kept moving, nervous energy pushing him on. He needed to find Yoongi, he needed to get more blood. Now. 

He barely remembered the trip down the stairs, stumbling through the house until he heard Yoongi’s voice coming from the library on the bottom floor. 

His feet felt heavy, and he leaned unsteadily against the wall as he reached the room, but something in Yoongi’s voice made him pause, hand stretched out toward the doorknob. 

Yoongi sounded terrible, exhausted and defeated as he spoke on the phone. 

“I don’t know how to handle this, Jinnie. This is the fourth time I’ve given him extra blood since you left and you’ve only been gone two weeks.”

There was a pause. 

“I know, I know I promised. But he’s struggling, and it’s harder with all of you gone.” 

Another pause. 

“I’ve tried that, but you’re right. I’m worried too. I’ve never seen a two year old so out of control. What if this keeps getting worse? Could we even keep him under safe if he went rogue? I’m worried every time we take him out that he might lose it, but we can’t keep him trapped in the house forever.”

Jungkook was frozen. They were talking about  _ him.  _ Yoongi was wondering if he was going to lose control. It was a possibility. Jungkook saw it on the news sometimes, reports of vampires consumed by bloodlust, killing indiscriminately. 

Jungkook didn’t want that. The last thing he ever wanted was to hurt someone. It was one thing to feed at the clubs, where the participants were willing, cared for, and compensated. But attacking a stranger? Draining them dry, maybe killing them? It was his worst nightmare.

Knowing that his hyungs thought that was possible… It burned almost as badly as the hunger. They had saved his life, welcomed him into their coven, into their nest, and he knew it hadn’t been easy for them. He wasn’t planned for, they hadn’t been given a choice, and they had still given him everything they could. 

He didn't stick around for the rest of the conversation. He carefully stepped back from the door, moving away with quiet steps. He couldn’t do it, he didn’t need to ask Yoongi for an extra serving. He had control. He wasn’t going to go rogue, he didn’t need an extra bag of blood. He’d had two, he’d get through the day. 

The trip back to his room passed in a blur. It wasn’t that late, he wasn’t tired, but he curled up into his bed anyways, hugging a pillow against his chest tightly. He was fine. He wasn’t hungry. 

His stomach burned. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I definitely wasn’t expecting to post another chapter so quick, but I got excited! Please excuse the excessive exposition, I know it’s a lot but there should be less of it as the story continues.
> 
> World building is hard. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Thank you to everyone who’s read so far. If a single person has enjoyed this story then I’m beyond thrilled!


	3. Chapter 3

Yoongi and Jungkook go out to feed on Monday, as promised. Yoongi made a point to come home well before dark that night, ready to go and waiting at the front door just as night fell. He wasn’t going to let Jungkook down a second time in a row. 

Heading out early means that they have their pick of clubs and blood bars, so after they hop into the car Yoongi directs them to their coven’s favorite; Eclipse. It’s not the biggest establishment, or the fanciest, but it’s impeccably clean and the blood donors are vetted thoroughly. 

From the moment they step out of the car and head to the entrance, Yoongi keeps a strong hold on Jungkook’s shoulder. It’s not painful, but there’s no give. Two years ago Jungkook would have hated it, the grip too obnoxious and controlling to be tolerated. 

These days he was grateful for it. He’s pretty sure his legs would have already collapsed underneath him without Yoongi’s support. 

The front of Eclipse is unassuming, a brightly lit sign the only indication of what was inside. The rest of the street is dark and empty, and the only movement he could see was the few people lingering outside the club. 

But Jungkook barely tracks the world around them, unable to concentrate as they walk up to the door. All he can focus on is the faint smell of humans and fresh blood wafting toward him from inside. It makes his fangs itch, and he feels Yoongi tighten his hand in response. 

“Soon, Baby. Be patient,” Yoongi murmured in his ear, before straightening up to address the bouncer at the front. 

Getting in is as easy as Yoongi flashing his membership card, pulling Jungkook close to his side as they finally enter the dimly lit lounge. 

There are over a dozen vampires inside, mingling by the bar and around the booths lining the back wall. It’s a pretty good sized crowd for a Monday at Eclipse. 

Yoongi leads them deeper in, bypassing the bar and it's deep red cocktails in favor of the booths. He nudged Jungkook in first, before scooting in himself to trap Jungkook against the far wall. The booths were designed this way for that exact reason, letting weaker willed vampires be corralled by their nestmates.

It’s a necessity that Jungkook’s never really minded before, but this time around the implications made his face heat. He was one of the vampires that couldn’t be trusted to stay in control. 

It only takes a minute or two for one of the hosts to approach them, holding a clipboard. She, like the rest of the hosts, was a vampire. Most clubs like this kept their human staff off the main floor whenever possible. 

Fewer accidents that way. 

“Hello! Have you two been here before?” She waits half a beat for them to nod, before continuing. “Excellent! Then you know the routine. Please fill out the paperwork as quick as you can, then we’ll put you in the queue. Wait times are about 30 minutes tonight, depending on what you’re looking for.” 

She placed the clipboard and pen down in front of them before heading right back into the crowd. 

This was far from Jungkook’s first time here, and at this point he was pretty sure he could fill the checklists out in his sleep. It was all relatively simple, with questions about preferences for biting spot (wrist or arm), age (2 years), and if he had supervision with him (yes, thanks Yoongi). 

Not every donor was comfortable with every preference, and others charged more for behaviors that were considered risky, like an unsupervised feeding. Jungkook couldn’t really blame them for it. There wasn’t a lot that a human could do, alone, against a feeding vampire. 

Yoongi looks over the paperwork for him after he finishes, and after a brief hesitation he pulls it closer to him. At the bottom, after the ‘other notes’ header, Yoongi added ‘issues with control’. “Just in case,” he murmurs apologetically to Jungkook. 

Jungkook felt his stomach drop, but didn’t argue. Yoongi wasn’t wrong, even if the truth was embarrassing. This just let the club know that they needed to be watched more carefully. It was for Jungkook’s sake as much as the donors. 

The host picked up their application just a few moments later and let them know they’d be called to the bar when their donor was ready. Their coven keeps a card on file at all of their favorite clubs, so the only thing left to do is wait. 

Jungkook honestly doesn’t remember how they spent their time waiting. He has some vague notion of Yoongi talking to him, nodding or shaking his head at points in response, but he couldn’t say what they’d been talking about. All he can focus on is the faint, sweet scent of fresh blood in the air and his own anticipation. 

Finally Jungkook’s name is called, and Yoongi guides him first to the bar to confirm their slot and then back to the private feeding room. 

Their donor is a middle aged woman with blond hair and a big smile, but Jungkook barely notices anything beyond the faint beating of her pulse. It’s Yoongi who introduces them, helps her settle in a comfortable position, then prompts Jungkook to sit. 

He lets Yoongi maneuver him, nudging him to the side until the donor’s arm is laid comfortably in front of him. 

Then Yoongi lets go of his shoulder, and it’s as easy as sinking forward and taking a bite. 

He’s latched onto her wrist, and he finally tastes fresh blood. It’s beautiful, warm and somehow soothing at the same time. There wasn’t a better feeling in the world, not since he’d been turned. The blood tasted like relief, like comfort. 

He drinks as quickly as he can and as much as he can. God, it was a rush. The blood flowed steadily and he felt drunk on it. It had banished the fuzziness that had wrapped itself around him the last few days, but replaced it with a different sort of daze. 

The blood flow under his mouth slowed slightly, so Jungkook flexes his mouth, jostling his fangs where they were latched in. The donor hisses in discomfort above him but he couldn’t really bring himself to care. As long as she didn’t pull away she could do whatever she wanted. 

Almost as soon as he thought that though, he felt Yoongi’s hand against the back of his neck, guiding him away. No, he wasn’t done. He’d missed this so badly, he wasn’t ready to stop. 

So he shook off Yoongi’s hand, jostling the bite again. There were words being exchanged above him, but they didn’t matter. The blood kept flowing and he kept drinking, eyes closed in bliss. 

Then a firmer hand is on his shoulder, and Yoongi presses against his back. There are more words being whispered directly into his ear, but Jungkook doesn’t care. His eyes snap open and snarls around his mouthful of wrist, careful not to dislodge from his bite. 

He wasn’t done! How did they not realize that? He needed this. 

He’s abruptly pulled away, hands in his mouth to pry it open and off of the donor’s arm. Jungkook thrashes, snarling and spitting and trying to fight his way back to the blissful peace he’d been wrapped in. There’s chaos as he lunges forward again, but Yoongi is wrapped around his front now. 

Yoongi wrestles him back, the foreign hands around his shoulders holding him in place, and lines their faces up so they’re close, Jungkook staring him right in the eye. 

“Sleep,” Yoongi commands firmly.

Then the world falls away. 

The rest of the night passes in starts and stops for Jungkook. He has moments of lucidity, like Yoongi tucking him into the big bed in Seokjin’s room, Taehyung and Jimin curled around him, then… nothing. 

He drifts back awake fully hours later, his nestmates pressed tightly against him on all sides. They’re all sleeping around him, and he can see just the faintest glow of light around the edges of the blackout curtains that hang over the windows of Jin’s room. 

He’d lost control. He’d honestly lost it, gone into a rage trying to drain someone dry. 

It was one step away from going completely rogue. Jungkook presses his eyes closed tightly. He’d sleep it off. He could make sense of this in the morning. Yoongi had pulled him off, charmed him to sleep, and he hadn’t killed anyone. 

Everything else could be tomorrow’s problem.

———

The incident at the club had shaken Jungkook, undermining the last bit of his confidence. He’d had his fair share of close calls before, all newborns had, but to lose it to the extent that Yoongi could barely hold him back? 

That was new. 

It was clear that the others were wary, not sure how to approach him in the days following. Even Yoongi was holding back, hovering around him but avoiding the topic. Even his absent hyungs had all found the time to get in touch, and it had taken several days of fielding their calls and texts for him to assure them he was okay, and that they didn’t need to come home. 

So he was redoubling his efforts to cut back on blood, sticking to his diet religiously. The coven had brainstormed several solutions to his problems with feeding over the last two years, and although none of them had done much before he incorporated whatever habits he could into his new routine. 

He never, ever wanted to lose control like that again. If his hyungs thought cutting back would help, then he was cutting back. 

He meditated every day now, drank his blood bags as slowly as he could, split his ration so he fed several times a day. Every idea they’d tried out in the last two years he dove back into with a vengeance.

He desperately wished he could reach out to Seokjin for advice, beyond the few brief calls he’d managed to have, as he had the most experience out of all of them and always had new ideas to try. But he hated that he’d have to admit how bad his control had become in their absence, and he didn’t want him to think they needed to cut their trip short because of him. 

All of this just made him wonder if his control had been this bad all along and he just hadn’t paid attention. 

Looking back on it, he was ashamed of how little effort he’d put into restraining himself. Even before the hyungs had started trying to reduce his blood intake, he’d regularly pushed them for more and more until they had to cut him off. It hadn’t been unusual for him to run through a month of their supplies in a week. 

They’d said it was fine at the time but he couldn’t blame them for being worried over it. Even after he started cutting down for real he hadn’t worked his hardest at it; every time the pain spiked he’d go running to the nearest Hyung to beg for more. 

They’d told him over and over that it was mental, that he’d be OK without the blood, but he’d let his own feelings of desperation overcome him. It was embarrassing to think about now, and he couldn’t help but wonder how much better things would have been now if he’d applied himself since the beginning. 

He couldn’t change the past, but he could start working harder now. Yoongi had pulled him aside the morning after their failed outing to Eclipse and told him gently that they wouldn’t be able to go again until the rest of the coven returned. 

Jungkook wanted to cry at the news, but just nodded his head, assuring Yoongi he understood. Honestly, after what had happened he wouldn’t blame Yoongi if he said he could never go back. The last thing their coven needed was for one of their members to go rogue. If that meant forcing himself to choke down blood bags for the rest of his undead existence, well, he probably deserved that at this point. 

If sating his hunger meant hurting or killing people, he’d rather go hungry.

———

The next time he sat down with the rest of the coven was almost a full two weeks after their failed trip to Eclipse, and despite his new determination to do better with his self control, he hadn’t exactly made any progress. 

He’s angry, irritable, and ready to snap, but has managed to avoid drawing too much attention to himself by aggressively avoiding everyone. Jungkook has seen them all in passing, spent enough time talking to them to ensure they weren’t too worried about him, and then otherwise holed himself up in his room. This, along with regular texts to his absent hyungs, kept him under their radar. 

But now he’s sitting at the dining room table, staring across at Yoongi as Jimin and Taehyung roughhouse next to him, desperately trying to process what Yoongi just told them.

Yoongi can’t get their blood on time, so they all have to go one day without blood. Jungkook has to go a day with no blood. Not a single bag. This is capital B Bad for Jungkook. 

“It’ll only be a day late, but I’m sorry for the trouble,” Yoongi said, shaking his head. “Will you all be alright? I can stop by a blood bank tomorrow if you need something in the meantime.”

Yoongi asks the question to the group, but it’s clear to Jungkook that the question is for him. He hesitates nervously, because he knows the answer is no. He will not be alright, he can barely live off of one bag a day as it is. But at the same time, it’s one day. 

An unscheduled trip to the blood bank meant Yoongi would have to take the night off work, make the hour drive, then wait in line until he could make a pickup. If he was lucky, it would take half the night. If the lines were long, he’d be lucky to get back before sunrise. 

So Jungkook just smiles and tells Yoongi that he’ll be fine. Even as Jungkook says it he’s regretting it, but at this point he’s pretty sure he owed it to Yoongi to at least try. He’d made enough trouble recently for Yoongi to clean up, he didn’t need to be adding to that right now. 

———

Jungkook is not ok.

It was almost daybreak, and he hadn’t had any blood in more than 24 hours. This was unbearable. He’d thought the cravings couldn’t get any worse than they were when he’d been drinking one bag a day, but he was so wrong. 

He was pretty sure that if he stood up he was going to fall flat on his face, so he stuck to his bed, laying stretched out on his back and staring up at the ceiling. He really hoped Yoongi or Jimin brought him a bag when their order came in, because he wasn’t entirely sure he’d be able to get out of bed to grab it. 

It’s boring, laying on the bed by himself, and he’s tired enough that he’d really like to fall asleep, but he can’t relax enough to drift off. He’s tense, and his mind is racing. All he can think about is how badly he wanted to feed. Just a little, to take the edge off. 

Jungkook would be more than happy to bite into a blood bag at this point. He’d choke it down without a single complaint, but his mind keeps drifting back to the night at Eclipse and his last taste of fresh, sweet blood. It had been so warm and comforting, soothing the burning hunger while melting the ice deep under his skin.

He lifts one of his arms above him, twisting his arm around as he examines his wrist. The donor at Eclipse had similar wrists, pale and slender. His bite had been shallow to avoid digging into her bones and tendons. It was easier to bite the inside of the elbow since there was more room for his fangs, but it meant he had to all but climb into a strangers lap to get the right angle. The wrist was easier. 

But he drags his eyes down his arm, his short sleeve shirt leaving his arm exposed to the room. His elbows had plenty of space, and if he pulled his arm down across his face he could just barely press his mouth into the bend. It would be much more convenient to feed off of someone like this, he thinks as he absently nuzzles into the crook of his arm. 

With his mouth pressed tight against his skin, he can feel the blood that pumps slowly through his veins. It’s different from human blood, cooler and moving slowly through his veins, but he can feel, suddenly, that the temptation is there. 

Without another thought, he lets his fangs sink deep into his arm. It is a better angle, he notes to himself a little hysterically. Beyond that though, it’s sweet. The first burst of blood fills his mouth and it stings, but he swallows it down. It’s a disturbing feeling, tugging and wrong in a way he couldn’t describe. Not to mention how badly it hurt. 

But at the same time, he didn’t want to stop. He drank, one careful mouthful at a time, until the cravings died away. Carefully, he slips his fangs free and just… stares. What the fuck had he just done?

Then bite marks on the inside of his arm bleed sluggishly, and Jungkook feels cold all over with the realization of what he did. It’s wrong, he knows it’s so, so wrong, but… he feels good. Well, not good, actually he feels sicker than ever, and the weight of his actions are making him dizzy. 

But he doesn’t feel desperate. The hunger is there, the never ending burn still present just under the surface. Despite the hunger though, he feels calm and in control. He’s not craving more blood, doesn’t have to fight fang and claw against his own instincts in an attempt to hold back. He feels like himself again, for the first time in weeks. 

Jungkook hisses in pain as he flexes his arm, the blood seeping from the bite slowing down to a trickle. It hurts, it hurts badly, but he can’t really bring himself to care. 

The pain felt an awful lot like freedom. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so hard to write! It really kicked my butt. There is an upside though, which is that I went ahead and outlined/started the next 3 chapters while I was stuck on this one. So hopefully they’ll be up a little sooner! (No promises, but I’ll do my best lol)
> 
> Also, thank you all SO much for all of the amazing comments. I didn’t expect this story to get any attention at all, so I’ve just been totally blown away. Y’all are awesome and so appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

_ 2 Years Ago _

The most important night of Jungkook’s life came immediately after an entirely uninteresting day. 

His classes that semester were spread out over the day, and initially he’d been annoyed with the long gaps between. But there had been some upsides to his weird schedule, and one of them was currently walking with him through campus. 

Taehyung took his evening lecture with him, and over the last 3 months he’d become one of his closest friends. He was also the first vampire Jungkook had ever formally met. 

He’d known prior to this semester that there was a reasonably sized vampire population on campus, but he’d never really met any until now. The closest he’d been to any vampire had been glimpses from a distance as he walked home in the early evening. 

But the one in his evening math class was approachable in a way vampires had never been to him. He’d sat next to him the first night and the rest was history; they’d been friends since. It was a little weird for Jungkook, who didn’t usually click with people easily. Somehow he’d fallen in with Taehyung, and he had no plans of looking back now. 

They’d made a routine of grabbing coffee together (well, sitting in a coffee shop for Taehyung) after class, since their math class was Jungkook’s last class of the day and Taehyung’s first. It was a nice little cafe, just outside campus and open late enough to accomodate vampires. 

Today was about as routine as his days got. 

“We have a test next week, right?” Taehyung asks him, adjusting the strap of his messenger bag as they walk through the dimly lit campus. 

“Yep. Do you think you’re ready for it?” 

“Not even a little!” Taehyung laughs, “I swear, math wasn’t this hard when I first learned it.”

When he’d first started talking to Taehyung, the reminders of his true age had been a little jarring. Taehyung looked like he was in his 20s, when in reality he was in his mid 70s. It had gotten a little less startling over time, but sometimes passing comments could still make Jungkook feel a little overwhelmed. 

“We could study together this weekend, if you want? I don’t mind pulling an all-nighter if you want to come to my place,” Jungkook offers. His dorm room was small, but it was a single, so he didn’t have roommates that they’d be keeping up. 

Taehyung hesitates, biting his lip before spinning around to face Jungkook, walking backward with grace that Jungkook was more than a little envious of. 

“How about you come to my place? Meet my coven? I’m sure my hyungs wouldn’t mind you staying over,” he asks in a rush, big doe eyes staring up at Jungkook. 

Jungkook would be lying if he said he wasn’t interested. Vampires may have been well known in human society, but they usually kept to themselves. Whether that was out of necessity or choice he didn’t know, but his curiosity wasn’t going to let him pass up the opportunity to see a coven first-hand. Plus, if they were anything like Taehyung, he was sure it’d be a blast. 

“Would they be alright with that? I don’t want to intrude,” he asks Taehyung. Yes, he was curious, but he didn’t like the idea of being an intruder in their home. 

“Yes! They’d be so fine with it! Does that mean you’ll come?” 

“Sounds like a plan, then,” Jungkook said with a grin. Suddenly his weekend was looking a lot more interesting. 

They continued talking about their days after that, trading stories back and forth throughout the walk to the coffee shop, until Taehyung is nearly late for class and Jungkook’s coffee has long gone cold. 

When they finally part ways, Jungkook’s cheeks are flushed from laughing too hard. It’s cold out, but Jungkook lives close to this side of the campus. He gives Taehyung a quick hug and waves him off as he runs in the direction of his next class. 

He turns back toward the road just in time to see the crosswalk switch, and steps into the street. 

The last thing he can remember is the bright glare of two headlights coming toward him and Taehyung screaming his name. 

——-

_ Present Day _

Jungkook was fixated on the bite marks on his arm after what he’d started referring to as ‘The Incident’. He wrapped them carefully in gauze each night and wore long sleeves whenever he stepped outside his room, paranoid that his hyungs would look at him and just  _ know.  _

But every time he was alone he unwrapped them so he could stare at them, run his fingers over them. They were two perfect marks, and he noticed very quickly that they didn’t heal the same way his injuries usually did. Since he’d been turned he hadn’t had a cut last more than two or three days, and usually there were signs it was healing within the first few hours. 

Days later, the marks lingered. 

He’d been tempted to try it again, see if it had been a fluke. His cravings had steadily ramped up after he’d fed from himself, but it had kept them away so much more effectively than the blood bags did. But at the same time… it had felt so wrong. He still got a little sick when he thought about it, and the lingering punctures hurt on him arm. 

He wasn't avoiding the others anymore, not really, but he still wasn’t going out of his way to see them. The tension that had filled the house after his trip to Eclipse subsided some, but it was easy enough for him to keep to himself. 

Normally this wouldn’t be allowed, he wouldn’t even be able to get away with it, but everyone was thoroughly preoccupied. The hyungs were coming home in 2 ½ weeks and all of them are counting down the days. 

The fact that he’d managed to avoid everyone for most of the time the others had been gone was a little unsettling to him, but Jungkook was really hoping that by the time the coven was reunited he’d have progress to show them. It would be a weight off of all of his hyungs shoulders when he was finally under control. 

In the meantime, Taehyung and Jimin were wrapped around each other trying to keep up with their classes without the support of the rest of the coven, and Yoongi looked more run down than they’d ever seen him. 

Chewing on his lips he glances down again at the bite on his arm, and thinking about his beloved coven, he promises himself that he won’t do it again. Once was enough. 

It’s the middle of the day when he tries again. 

He’d just finished his blood bag from the previous night, having saved it as long as he could stand. He’d been testing his control the last few days, pushing the time between his feedings as much as he could stand. 

He wanted another bag. No, that was a lie. He wanted fresh blood. But that wasn’t going to happen any time soon.

Jungkook had figured out with some trial and error that he could usually last just about 24 hours on a single blood bag before it started affecting his concentration and coordination. 

From past conversations with the coven he knew that, as a young vampire, he should be able to extend his feedings to once every 48 hours before it impacted his ability to function. So that was his current target. His record was 26 hours before he felt his limbs go heavy and slow, noticeable to the point his hyungs would definitely be concerned if they saw him. 

He’s pretty sure that just means he needs more practice.

When he could, he timed it so he saw his hyungs right after he fed, when he was at his most coherent. 

But it was hard. It seemed like his body was actively fighting him. Some nights his dinner would carry him through the next day with just the normal hunger pains, and other nights he’d drink his serving of blood and almost immediately feel too hungry to stand. It wasn’t predictable, and it made him worry that he couldn’t tell if he was making any progress. He  _ needed _ to make progress. 

Luck was not on his side tonight. Despite just having fed, he wanted more. So badly. He’d been on a roll though, and he loathed the idea of breaking his streak. He wasn’t going to fold at the first hint of hunger, not anymore. 

He holds out as long as he could, rolling around on his bed and doing his best to distract himself. He plays games on his phone, he paces in front of his bed. Drops to the floor to do push-ups until the dizziness makes him stop. Laying face down on his bedroom floor, his arm aches where it’s pressed into the ground. 

Maybe…

Maybe that was the solution. Not all the time, but nights like this. Nights where he was on the verge of breaking immediately after feeding. After all, he was just recycling the blood he’d already drank, right? It’s not like he was cutting himself and just letting it bleed. And it stung, when he drank it, but it was far more palatable than the plastic-flavored blood bags. 

Carefully, sits up and peels his shirt over his head, folding it and placing it to the side. He still has gauze wrapped around his left arm, so he turns to his right. 

And he feeds. 

———

Yoongi was a little worried about Jungkook. He felt like he’d barely seen their youngest nestling since Seokjin and the others had left for the conference. They were all busy, but Yoongi couldn’t help but feel like it was more than that. 

Taehyung and Jimin had noticed the same, Jungkook making excuses and skipping out on their regularly scheduled movie nights and video game marathons. 

They’d all talked a little, trying to puzzle out if something was wrong. It happened sometimes that one of them needed space, and that was fine, but they didn’t want to ignore it if this was a sign of something more serious. Jimin thought that maybe Jungkook felt neglected, with all of them out of the house, but Taehyung was sure he just missed the rest of the coven. 

Taehyung usually had the best instincts for Jungkook’s moods, so Yoongi was inclined to believe him. But the worry was still there. 

He pulled the fridge open as he thought, pausing as he went to grab his own dinner. 

Wait, why was there extra blood in the fridge? It was nearly daybreak.

Part of Yoongi’s responsibilities while the rest of the coven was gone was keeping track of the blood supply. He reordered when they were low, trying to avoid exactly the situation they’d had last week when they’d run out, and making sure their fledglings were eating the right amount. They all had different needs but it was important, for both self control and for comfort, that they stayed on a regular schedule. 

Hungry vampires could be... unpredictable. 

It was easy for newly turned vampires to make themselves sick, either by over or under eating. Jimin and Taehyung really barely counted as fledglings these days, but all the maknaes still needed to be prompted now and then. 

More often it was a matter of their blood supply draining too quickly, particularly if Jungkook was struggling. He was never able to hide when he pilfered an extra serving of blood without asking, but when his cravings were strong it didn’t matter if he knew he’d be caught. 

Yoongi was sympathetic when it happened; hunger pains were awful. He couldn’t imagine living with them constantly for two years. His had lasted barely 3 months and had still made him question if eternal life would be worth it. It was one of the reasons he had such a hard time saying no when Jungkook asked for more servings; they were trying to help him, not torture him.

He checked in with Jimin and Taehyung first, figuring one of them had forgotten to eat, and was left puzzled when they both assured him they’d just finished. 

So if it wasn’t them… Then had Jungkook not eaten?

He knocks on Jungkook’s door and smiles despite his worry when he hears a startled yell and a crash from inside. 

“One sec!”

Jungkook answers the door a second later, hair fluffy and sticking straight up. So cute. 

“Hey, just checking if you’ve fed today. We have an extra bag in the fridge,” Yoongi explains. 

“Oh, I haven’t yet. Thanks for the reminder… I guess I wasn’t hungry,” Jungkook tells him, a little sheepishly. 

Yoongi’s eyebrows shot up.

“Really?” 

Jungkook just bobs his head up and down quickly, looking a little overwhelmed himself at the realization. Yoongi was pretty sure he’d never heard Jungkook say he wasn’t hungry. 

“That’s good to hear,” Yoongi says with a relived smile, “I’m glad it’s easing up a little. But try to make sure you stick to one bag a day for now, even if you’re not hungry. We can reduce your feedings when the others get back, if your hunger hasn’t ramped up again.”

It was usually Seokjin and Hoseok who decided on their feeding schedules, with Namjoon keeping track of deliveries. As the second-oldest, Yoongi would traditionally be the next in charge after Jin, but had relinquished his position in favor of his more responsible nestmates. 

Yes, he was old, but he had never paid much attention to anything outside of his coven. The others were much better choices when it came to making these judgment calls, and none of them could top Jin when it came to vampiric knowledge anyways. 

It was a big relief that Jungkook was doing better. 

———

Jungkook was lying to his hyungs now. Actively lying. 

Sort of? 

With more bite marks on his arms, he’d had to find new ways of hiding them. He felt guilty for it, but couldn’t bring himself to regret it. Or to stop. He’d fed off of himself three times in the last two days, and it had improved his control drastically. 

The hunger was there, but it wasn’t any more intense than it normally is, and he felt in control of the urges in a way he hadn’t since he was turned. For once he didn’t  _ need  _ it. 

His new method of feeding certainly came with drawbacks, but Jungkook would trade all of his new aches and pains in order to soothe the hunger in an instant. And he did. 

He knew he should tell Yoongi, or any of the others, about what he was doing. The way it hurt when he bit himself… he knew it wasn’t right. There was something deeply wrong and disturbing about what he was doing to himself. 

But if he did, Yoongi would tell him to stop. He was sure he would. He’d never, ever heard of a vampire doing this to themselves. And then the out of control urge to feed would be back, right alongside the familiar hunger pain. He wasn’t sure he could go back, now that he’d found a solution. 

It wasn’t as good as a fresh feeding, the hunger never dissipated, not even for the short time it usually left him alone after he fed from a human but… he never really got fresh blood all that often, anyways, so what did it matter? If he didn’t get himself under control it was possible he’d  _ never  _ get another fresh feeding. So this was better. 

It was a little lonely, the time he’d spent hiding out in his rooms, but it was necessary. He was improving every day. It was easy to choke down his blood bag in front of the others now, knowing that he’d have some real satisfaction as soon as soon as he could slip away. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya’ll have me so excited to update this fic, honestly, it’s crazy. So here’s another chapter! The next one will probably take little longer, but it’s already in progress.
> 
> Ty for being awesome and reading this!


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